Showing posts with label Relating. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Relating. Show all posts

Intimate loving - Orgasmic living

Man Woman Kissing Intimacy Nature Sensual
For a lot of people there is a certain misunderstanding and mystery surrounding Tantra and sex. This is partly due to the way in which we view and approach sex, both on our own or with a partner. In the west we often crave immediate gratification, using sex as a source of releasing stress, seeing ejaculation as the goal to be reached, touching but not really feeling the other person, assuming that if you just spend some time focusing on the genital area, he/she will be turned on and ready for the ‘next step.’
Whilst there is nothing particularly bad about that you can lose the more subtle and expanding sensations as the experience tends to be limited and localized in the genital area only. We look for outside sources for stimulation, for example, pornography, sex toys, fantasies, something (or someone) new to spice things up. We can lose the ability to just look within to turn ourselves on.

There are many stereotypical ideas that we attach or expect from each other. Men are often expected to be powerful and to initiate sex. They may feel pressure about giving a good performance and having an amazing sexual technique. This can lead to anxiety and disconnection as it then becomes a sex ‘act’ by only staying in the mind rather than approaching lovemaking from your heart and body too. Women can often have negative feelings about their bodies; not smooth, thin, firm, too fat, too dimply...the list can be endless. Social conditioning can make it difficult for women to express their desires and needs for the fear of seeming aggressive or feeling vulnerable.

Only by discarding those gender stereotypes and allowing ourselves to accept and explore both the masculine and feminine aspects in each of us can we begin to relate to each other and understand our full potential.

Often in our relationships it can be difficult to maintain the freshness and the wonder that we had in the early stages of being together. We get attached to the story of who we are and the roles we play within our partnership. Old resentments and playing out old habits of relating to each other make it difficult to view our beloved through fresh eyes. This often carries through to our sexual relationships and it can quickly feel stale as we struggle to retain the early excitement. We can sometimes feel disconnected as we struggle to let go of old hurts and emotions bubbling under the surface.

In Tantric lovemaking we focus on being in the present and having a sense of awareness and consciousness with every gesture and touch, allowing our intention to be clear and flowing freely, which naturally occurs when surrendering into the present moment. Tantric lovemaking is like a dance; it is the energy between two people and what it creates and stirs deep within, flowing between you in an organic way. It is a shared journey and a merging of sexual energy, passion and intimacy building in a slow conscious way....melting together. It is less about doing something and more about just being.

Our Tantric sexual journey is made sacred; one way is to create a new environment, in fact we often refer to it as our sacred space. Our sacred space is the place in which all that is failing to serve us is left outside. For example an argument we may have had with a partner is left aside. A big part of Tantra is communication with open hearts, this makes it easier to tap into our truth and share in an uncensored way with our partner without fear or judgement.

A beautiful Tantric exercise is the hollow bamboo. This is where one partner assumes the role of giver and the other as receiver. The giver, Shiva, is the empty bamboo and must listen in totality to instructions by the receiver, Shakti. An example is Shiva giving Shakti a yoni massage. Eye contact and direct communication is kept throughout and Shiva is wholly there for whatever Shakti's experience may be. It can be extremely healing for both partners, as well as being mind blowing and orgasmic.....

Although we do not offer Tantric sex sessions, we do offer ways in which you can start to explore your own personal Tantric journey.

Love Carmelle and Rachael